


Surprise!

by delicatelyglitterywriter



Category: Bernice Summerfield (Books & Audio), Gallifrey (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:56:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26544073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delicatelyglitterywriter/pseuds/delicatelyglitterywriter
Summary: Braxiatel has had his fair share of surprises throughout his lifetime, but nothing could have prepared him for the surprise of Benny being the President of Gallifrey.
Relationships: Bernice Summerfiedl & Legion Ensemble Cast, Bernice Summerfield/Leela, Irving Braxiatel & Bernice Summerfield
Comments: 10
Kudos: 13





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much for kitty form discord for giving me this idea :D

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Romana discovers a not-very-nice comment on her story

“K-9, read out the comments left on the latest chapter of ‘The Plant Touchers’,” Romana commands, from where she’s lazily scrolling through her inbox to forward various emails to others who could take care of them for her. 

By her side, K-9 whirrs, obediently checking the comments.

“3 comments,” K-9 informs her. “First comment is from user Art-Bastard-Extraordinaire, which reads: ‘what a thrilling chapter. I particularly enjoyed how Lunadra came to the realisation that she is completely and hopelessly in love with Sigma; I do love a good love story. I can’t wait to find out about Sigma’s reaction when he realises that he is in love with her. Good work, as always, I look forward to the next update.’ 

“Second comment is from user Sweet-Summer-Child, which is in all capital letters. The comment begins with a ‘keysmash’ and then continues on with: ‘my darling girl Lundra, I love her so much, I just want her and Sigma to get together.’ This is followed by several exclamation points and a declaration that they left the story to go and scream.”

“Oh dear,” Romana murmurs, a smile on her face. “I hope their throat didn’t get too sore. What’s the third comment?”

“Third comment is from an anonymous user, calling themselves ‘Don't-Like-It’. Their comment reads: ‘Wow, this is bad. Completely implausible. Bad characters and even worse plot. Abandon this and go do something you’re actually good at.’”

Romana raises her eyebrows and turns her head. “Someone really left that on the story?”

“Affirmative, Mistress.”

“Pathetic,” Romana scoffs. “Even Darkel’s insults hurt worse than that did.” She pauses, thoughtful. “K-9, search the rest of OurStory for that same commenter. I want to know if they target any stories they don’t like, or if it’s me, specifically, they intend to tear down.”

“Searching OurStory,” K-9 says, his ears swishing back and forth. After a minute, he gives his results. “Number of comments by commenter ‘Don't-Like-It’: 5,234, Mistress.”

“Over five thousand?” Romana repeats, completely shocked.

“Affirmative, Mistress.”

“Well, can you find the device it was sent from, so we know who this commenter is?”

K-9 whirrs again, searching. “Negative, Mistress. Comments appear to originate from public devices; commenter cannot be tracked by this unit.”

Romana sighs. “I see.” She sits up. “Guess I’ll just have to do it the old fashioned way, then.”

“Mistress?”

Romana swings her legs over the edge of the couch to face K-9, and smiles. “I have a plan. The first thing we’ll need is a new President, but they’ll have to meet some very specific criteria. If I give you the criteria, can I trust you to find me a suitable candidate?”

“Affirmative, Mistress,” says K-9, eagerly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *opening theme starts playing*


	2. The Lady President of Gallifrey And All Her Dominions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A pep talk from her friends and family is really all Benny needs, to accept her role as President of Gallifrey. It helps that the Presidential Bodyguard seems cool, too.

Some wise guy once said that the only certainties in life are death and taxes. Unfortunately for the Time Lords, this means that not even having a non-Gallifreyan President is off the table. 

Which, much to many of their dismays, is precisely what has happened.

However, no one is more displeased about this than Professor Bernice Surprise Summerfield herself - the very woman the title of President had been handed to. She sits at the President’s desk in the President’s office, pouting in a very un-President-like manner.

“Pouting isn’t very becoming of the Lady President of Gallifrey and All Her Dominions,” Jack points out, from where he’s seated on the corner of the desk. Benny glares at him. Jack is undeterred, even going so far as to smirk - actually  _ smirk _ \- as if he’s amused by all of this. Benny tightens her jaw and looks away.

“He’s right, mum,” Peter says, lounging sideways in one of the three chairs on the other side of the desk. His legs are draped over one armrest and his back leans against the other. His hands are folded behind his head to support his neck in an upright position, and it’s all Benny can do to not tell him that his back will get sore from sitting like that. “You look like a kid who’s just been told they can’t have a cookie until after dinner.”

Benny gapes at him. The nerve of her own  _ son _ to tell her that  _ she’s _ acting like a child! She knows he’s right, of course, but that doesn’t mean she likes to hear it. She glares at him, too. Peter, like Jack, is unbothered by her glare. Benny huffs and slumps back in her seat.

“Come on, Benny,” Ruth soothes, sitting in the second of the two chairs like a normal bloody person - thank heavens  _ someone _ in her friendship group is normal. “I know you’d rather not, but you  _ are _ the most powerful woman on the planet now; hell, even the cosmos if I followed that Time Lord’s explanation correctly. You can boss around whoever you want without consequence.”

“Are you saying I’m  _ bossy _ ?” Benny asks, her voice somewhere between incredulous and very sorry indeed. 

“Yes,” Ruth says bluntly. “But that’s okay, bossy is good sometimes, like now, for instance. You can boss people around to your heart’s content. Isn’t that something to smile about?”

“I suppose you’re right,” Benny concedes, exhaling slowly as her pout disappears. “I just...why did it have to be  _ this _ job?”

“I could take over for you, if you’re really that upset about-” Jack begins, only to be cut off by Benny.

“ _ No _ , absolutely  _ not _ . You’d make a mess of this planet within the first day.”

Jack frowns, though Benny can see in his face that he’s not genuinely upset. “I take offence at that.”

“Good. Now, get off my desk.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Jack mutters, but does as he’s told anyway, getting off the desk and sitting in the chair. Well, ‘in’ is a bit of a generous term. Really, he climbs  _ onto _ the chair and sits atop the back of it, his feet resting where his butt should be. Benny rolls her eyes and sighs wearily. Oh, for the day when Jack wasn’t such a-

“What about me, mum?” Peter offers, cutting into her thoughts. “I could-”

“That’s very sweet, but no. Your talents lie in security and the enforcing of law and all that, not in paperwork and diplomacy.” Benny shudders at the word ‘diplomacy’. “Besides, Romana asked  _ me _ , specifically. If any of you had been wanted,  _ you _ would have been asked. This is something  _ I _ have to do, not you.”

“So,” Jack says, drawing out the ‘o’ sound. “You’re not going to pout anymore?”

“No,” Benny says calmly, deliberately ignoring his comment about pouting.

“I presume this means you want me working for the CIA?” Peter asks. Benny nods.

“If that’s okay with you?”

“‘Course.” Peter stands, stretching and wincing slightly. Benny shakes her head slightly. She knew that would hurt his back. “I’ll get right to it.”

Benny gives him a grateful smile. “Thanks, Peter.”

“Yeah. Take care.”

“You too.”

The door slides closed with a hiss as Peter leaves. Benny turns her attention back to Ruth and Jack. She pulls her lips to one side, thinking.

“Ruth,” she says slowly, decidedly. “I want you to go and work in the Archives.”

“Oh.” She sounds surprised. “Any reason for that, or…?”

“You’re a historian, aren’t you? Or at least, you were, back in Atlantis. Surely you still have some of those talents?”

“Well, yes, I suppose so.”

“Good, then I want you to use your talents there. And don’t feel like you have to hide things from me, alright?”

“Okay.” A look of realisation crosses Ruth’s face. “ _ Oh _ , I see. Yes, I can do that. Just the Archive, or the people there, too?”

“Both. The present is just as important as the past.”

“Wait, am I missing something?” Jack asks, looking back and forth between the two of them. “Why does it sound like you’re scheming and plotting?”

“Aren’t we always?” Ruth says lightheartedly. Jack sticks his tongue out at her. She mimics him.

“Yes, you are missing something, Jack,” Benny says. Jack turns to her. “You’re missing a job.”

“Benny, do I really have to-”

“Yes. Jack, I want you to work as a janitor. Or maintenance engineer. Or whatever they call it here on Gallifrey.”

“You...You want me to  _ clean floors and toilets _ ?!” Jack asks indignantly. “That’s low, Benny, even for you!”

“No, I want you to be able to roam freely throughout the Capitol,” Benny explains. “A janitor has free access to basically anywhere inside the Dome.”

“O-o-o-o-oh! You want me to be your eyes and ears and report suspicious stuff back to you! Got it!”

“Yes, that’s the idea,” Benny sighs. “Although, I do wish you’d be a  _ little _ more discreet; I’m not trying to advertise myself as ‘the President who knows nothing about the planet she’s supposed to lead’.”

“Right, yes, of course. Sorry. I take it you don’t trust the Time Lords, then?”

“Not in the slightest,” Benny answers without hesitation. “If Irving Braxiatel is any indication of what Time Lords are like, they’re all untrustworthy until proven otherwise. I assume you two will be fine, since you’re just two people looking for work, but watch your backs nonetheless, yeah?”

“Yeah, sure,” Jack says.

“Of course, Benny,” Ruth says at the same time. Benny smiles at them as they stand to leave.

“Thanks.”

“What about you?” Ruth asks. “If you’re alone, won’t that make you vulnerable, or whatever? Who’s going to watch your back?”

“One of Romana’s friends,” Benny answers. “Lily, I think? Lilith? Lalla? Whatever her name is, her job is Presidential Bodyguard, and that means she’ll be guarding me.”

“But I thought you just said Time Lords couldn’t be trusted?”

“I am no Time Lord,” a new voice says. Benny, Jack, and Ruth all turn to look, and see an unfamiliar woman standing in the doorway. She wears a simple sleeveless light yellow dress that comes down to about mid-thigh, and around her waist is a belt with an attached scabbard, just large enough for a knife. Benny thinks her quite beautiful. “And my  _ name _ is Leela.”

“Oh,” says Benny. “Yes. Well, er, come in.”

Leela does so, addressing Ruth and Jack as the door slides shut behind her. “The Time Lords are not kind to aliens; they will believe you stupid until you prove otherwise. But I find that it is best to let them think you are stupid. They are not as careful with what they say when they think you cannot understand.”

Benny raises her eyebrows. “I think I like you, Leela.”

Leela smiles at her, accepting the compliment. “Thank you. I hope I will like you, too.”

“What, one look at me wasn’t enough to make you go ‘hmm yes, this woman is wonderful’?” Benny jokes. Jack groans and Ruth sighs in unison.

“Why Romana asked  _ you _ to be the President, I’ll never know,” Jack snipes. 

“Because I’m the bossy one, remember?”

“And the one with an ego the size of a planet,” Ruth mutters. Benny glances at Leela, though she doesn’t know why, and finds that Leela seems amused by the conversation.

“Romana picked Bernice because she said she had the best chance of surviving her presidency,” Leela states. Benny does a double take, Ruth’s eyes go wide, but Jack just looks intrigued.

“Assissation attempts are common, then?” he queries.

“No,” Leela says. “But neither are alien Presidents.”

There’s a solemn silence. The words sink in, the same way a person sinks into a foam pit. 

“Well, that’s cheery,” Benny says, breaking the silence. “How long have you guarded Romana?”

Leela thinks about it for a few seconds before answering. “About 10 years now, and she is still alive and healthy.”

“That’s comforting,” Benny says genuinely. Ruth clears her throat. 

“Yes, well, we’ll be off, then. See you tonight, Benny?”

“Yeah. See you.”

Jack opens his mouth to say something, but Ruth drags him out before he can, for which Benny’s grateful for. She has the distinct feeling that if Jack stayed a second longer, the atmosphere would become very, very awkward. 

The door hisses closed and she turns to Leela. She feels she ought to say something, but she’s unsure what to say. 

“Hi,” she says awkwardly, after a short pause.

“Hello.”

“I’m Benny.”

“Benny?” Leela asks, confused. “But I thought your name was Bernice?”

“It is, but Benny is like a nickname. Something my friends call me, kind of thing.”

“Oh, I see!” Leela says. “Does that mean we are friends, if you would like me to call you that?”

“Well, you haven’t given me a reason to think of you as an enemy, so yeah, I’d say we’re friends. Besides, we’re both humans...I mean, assuming you’re human?”

“I am.”

“Well, then, there you are.”

Leela frowns, just a little. She tilts her head and considers Benny, as if searching for something. Unsure what else to do, Benny waits. Eventually, Leela breaks into a grin.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Benny. I think I shall enjoy serving as your bodyguard.”

Benny lets out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding, and she smiles back. 

“Glad to hear it.” She motions at the chairs. “Please, sit down, if you like.”

Leela sits down.

“So, you’re one of Romana’s closest friends, right?”

“I am her closest friend, yes,” Leela confirms with a nod. Benny leans forward. 

“Cool. So tell me: why did Romana need a replacement in such a hurry, and why did she choose me, specifically?”


	3. The Summon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Braxiatel's evening musings are interrupted by a summon from the President herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> content warning for alcohol
> 
> also, not confident with writing brax so pls be gentle in comments!!

“Perfection does not exist.” Irving Braxiatel fills his wine glass and settles back in his chair, looking out at the sunsets. “No, perfection does not exist, but this moment comes pretty damn close.”

Braxiatel blinks somewhat wearily, allowing himself to feel the tiredness of his muscles, and the burden of his existence. It’s not easy for him to be a Time Lord, and even harder to be one who’s seen the future and can do nothing about it.

“The universe is cold, and cruel,” he murmurs to himself. He takes a sip of his wine. “But it’s hardly the fault of the universe. It’s just a series of never-ending responses to various forces within it. An eternal cause-to-effect.” He sighs deeply. “A paradox, really - that one knows there will be consequences, but is oftentimes uncertain about the extent and magnitude of said consequences. Predictable, yet unpredictable. Such is life.”

He sits in silence a few minutes, simply drinking his drink and watching the suns sink slowly down to touch the horizon, before beginning to burrow under it. After the silence, he sighs once more.

“Ah, the paradox of life. Cruel, and yet kind. Certain, and yet full of surprises.” He sits thoughtfully. “Though I do suppose that’s where the beauty and meaning of life is found.”

He sighs yet again, but this time with a slight smile on his face. “If only I had a suitable conversation partner to join me. Someone like Leela, perhaps.”

Braxiatel huffs a soft, fond laugh. Leela. It’s been a while since he’s talked to her. Granted, it’s been a while since he’s talked to  _ any _ of his friends - being off-world makes regular communication difficult - but he does think he misses talking with Leela most of all. It’s strange, really, he muses silently, that the person he should miss the most is not even one of his own species.

But he can’t really help it. Honestly, he can’t. Leela, though used to far more primitive technology and ways of thinking, possesses a deep wisdom and thoughtfulness that many Time Lords have forgotten in their millenia of steady progress. She can’t comprehend things that even their Time Tots know, but she understands more about life than most Time Lords will ever know.

“Leela understands life because she understands death,” Brax says, to no one in particular. Perhaps he’s addressing that lone tree that stands closer to the Citadel than the other trees, or perhaps he’s just talking to himself. Even he doesn’t know which it is. “She understands the fleeting nature of life in a way us Time Lords don’t until our last regeneration, and even then I’m not so sure we can understand it quite like she does.”

He sighs deeply and lifts his glass, rolling it around lazily in his hand, making the liquid inside swirl around gently. He takes a sip and sighs again. 

“I certainly know how to pick the best wines,” he murmurs. “Not to brag, of course. I am many things, but a bragger is not one of them.”

“That is a lie,” a voice says from behind him. He processes the voice as belonging to Leela, even as he whirls around. He sees her, leaning up against the frame of the door that opens onto the balcony on which he sits, her expression somewhere between a satisfied smirk that she’d been able to frighten him, and a soft, touched smile. He clears his throat, setting his drink down.

“How much of my...musings did you hear?” he wonders as he stands.

“I arrived when you started talking about how I understand death,” Leela says. Braxiatel is relieved she didn’t pull the ‘long enough’ that’s excruciatingly common amongst those who consider themselves witty and/or intelligent. 

That’s one thing he appreciates about Leela. She doesn’t try to impress him with words or wit. In fact, she doesn’t try to impress him at all. She just  _ is _ ; she simply  _ does _ , and if he is impressed, then that’s more a reflection of him than her.

Braxiatel shakes his head to banish his musings. The time for musing is over, and he has a distinct feeling he’s not going to be able to get back to it until much later. He straightens himself, tugs the sleeves of his blazer and rolls his shoulders back, slipping back into his usual professionalism - with just a hint of friendliness - with practised ease.

“I see. What can I do for you, Leela?”

“The President has sent me to fetch you,” Leela says. “She wishes to speak with you.”

Braxiatel narrows his eyes ever so slightly. Since when did Leela begin referring to Romana as ‘the President’, without hesitation or the slightest hint of anger in her voice? If Braxiatel didn’t know better, he could have sworn that he even heard the tiniest inflection of  _ amusement _ in her tone. He convinces himself he didn’t hear it, too unsettled by the implications of such a tone.

“Very well,” he concedes. “I presume she’s in her office?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Would you be so kind as to tell her I will be there, as soon as I’ve cleaned up, would you?”

Leela nods once, agreeing, and then leaves. Braxiatel cleans up quickly, not wanting to risk getting lost in his thoughts again; he knows how cranky Romana can get when she has to send for someone twice. Once done, he takes a moment to run a comb through his hair, just to ensure he’s presentable, and walks to the President’s Office. On the way, he wonders what Romana wants, and why she couldn’t have just called him via communicator. He was, after all, really enjoying the sunsets. 

Arriving at her office, he knocks. It’s at this point that everything starts to go horribly, terribly wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was going for 'brax is an overdramatic garbage man' in case you couldn't tell skldfjskld


	4. Cousin of Lungbarrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Braxiatel reflects on his summon to the President's office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> still not overly confident in writing brax, so pls do be a bit gentle about it. also thanks ivy for helping me edit this chapter :)

Everyone has regrets.

Some regret doing something, while others regret  _ not _ doing something. Other regrets are regrets of not doing something differently - the whole ‘if I could go back and change something, or do something differently, it would be that thing’. Unfortunately, no one has that luxury, not even Time Lords; Rules Of Time and all that.

The current regret Braxiatel feels as he lays on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, falls into the former category. Of course, he’d had no choice - when his President called, he came - but he does wish he’d been a  _ little _ more cautious than he had been. 

But, then again, he  _ had _ been expecting to see Romana. She was, after all, the President. Or was. Before...whatever it was, that he had no idea about - which is impressive given that he makes it his business to know everything about everything Romana does - had happened. He knows he’ll have to get to the bottom of that mystery later, after he’s finished processing what happened and despairing at the events of the past half hour, which went something like this.

* * *

Braxiatel knocked on the door of the President’s office, quieting his feelings of giddiness (he shudders at this; he is a  _ dignified _ Time Lord, he should  _ not _ be experiencing a schoolboy’s emotions; at least, not right in front of the President) at the thought of seeing Romana again. His giddiness faded of its own accord when he heard, not Romana’s voice, but the voice of  _ Bernice Summerfield _ , of all people, answer.

“Yeah, come in.”

He almost felt disappointed that it wasn’t Romana, but his curiosity quashed any feelings of sadness before they could set in properly. What was Benny doing on Gallifrey? Why didn’t Romana answer? Did Romana need her for something? What was she needed for? Was Romana present? Why wouldn’t she be present? What were they plotting? Was plotting too harsh of a word?

The questions tumbled through Brax’s mind at great speeds as he pressed the door release on the wall and stepped through, greeting Benny with a warm smile.

“Bernice!” he said, genuinely warmed to his toes by seeing her again. “What a pleasant surprise! Where’s Roma…”

He trailed off when he saw what Benny was wearing: the Time Lords’ Presidential Robes, collar and all. His smile faltered.

“Benny, why on  _ earth _ are you wearing  _ that _ ?!”

“Because I’m the President,” Benny said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Believe me, Braxiatel, I wouldn’t be wearing these if I had the choice. I mean, have you  _ seen _ this collar?” She reached up to lightly tug at it, as if it were uncomfortable. “Granted, Gallifrey is infamous for its pompous lifestyle, but even this is over-the-top, don’t you think?”

“But...I...You... _ What _ ?!” Brax stammered, and then was promptly embarrassed that  _ he _ , Irving Braxiatel, had just  _ stammered _ his way through a pitiful excuse for a sentence. “Only Time Lords can be Presidents!”

“Yes. Your point?”

Brax felt as if he might spontaneously combust, he’s so flummoxed and disconcerted by the situation as a whole, and the fact that Benny seemed to have forgotten that she is not, in fact, a Time Lord. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He needed to remain  _ calm _ . When he felt ready, he spoke again.

“Bernice,” he said gently. “I’m not sure if you’ve forgotten, but you’re human, and very much  _ not _ a Time Lord.”

“Well, no,” Benny agreed. “But I’m close enough to a Time Lord that it counts.”

Brax’s frown deepened. “What  _ do _ you mean, Benny?”

“I’m a cousin of Lungbarrow,” Benny said matter-of-factly, typing something on the datapad in front of her. “I found out completely by accident on one of my many adventures a while back, but I didn’t have time until very recently to come to Gallifrey to learn about my relation to the House of Lungbarrow.”

Benny’s words hit Brax so hard, he isn’t sure  _ what _ to feel. A  _ cousin _ ? Of  _ House Lungbarrow _ ? It’s completely ridiculous, but Benny sounds so  _ certain _ …

“I’m still not sure how all the Time Lord family trees work, but I had that CIA bloke - Marvin, I think his name is - graph me a tree so I can see where I fit in.”

Benny handed Brax the datapad, and, true to her word, there’s a family tree, with her name in red against all the black names so it’s clear where she slots in. Glancing over it, Brax could determine that it was real, or at least, a good enough fake to  _ seem _ to be legitimate. He handed the datapad back without a word, getting a queasy feeling in his stomach from his worldview being so violently thrown into disarray.

“So, yeah. That’s the ‘why’ as to why I’m here, and how I got to be President, now for the reason I’ve called you here.”

Brax blinked several times, fighting the feeling of ‘I want to crawl into a blanket fort and lay there until this is all over’, struggling to accept the information, despite the seemingly genuine information that had been presented to him. Benny seemed to take notice and looked at him, concern etched in her features.

“Are you alright, Brax? You’re looking a bit green around the gills.”

“I, erm,” Brax swallowed and cleared his throat, trying desperately to resign himself to the fact that, for now, this is how things were, “Yes. Yes, I’m perfectly alright. Do go on.”

Benny smiled at him and closed the document she’d opened on her datapad to show him. “There’s been some complaints from the Academy of mysterious slimy trails appearing randomly around the place. They’re far too large to be those of a slug - even a giant slug - and they want me to do something about it. But, I do have other important, President-y stuff to do, so can you go investigate and deal with that, please?”

Brax felt unsure as to how many more strange occurrences he could take. Nonetheless, he nodded, knowing the sooner he agreed, the sooner he could be out of there. 

“Of course.”

Benny grinned at him. “Thanks, Brax. Let me know when it’s all sorted out. Okay, leave me alone now.”

Brax was more than happy to do as he was told, and he fled the office, retreating at once to his rooms. Mysterious slime or not, he needed time to process this.

* * *

He exhales slowly, almost a groan. By now, he’s calmed down enough to get a grip on his emotions and can think clearly. 

Nothing makes sense. He knows everything  _ seems _ to be in order, but he  _ knows _ that something isn’t right; that there’s something he doesn’t know about all of this. He makes a silent vow to himself to solve this puzzle, in between whatever other tasks Benny decides to boss him into doing.

“Oh, Bernice,” he sighs, sluggishly pushing himself into a sitting position. “Oh,  _ Benny _ . What  _ has _ happened to you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> braxiatel likes to make blanket forts and sleep in them. this is the hill i die on.


End file.
